Nurit Gans

It is midnight, I am tired. The day doesn’t seem to end. I’m still awake thinking what will be my plan for tonight. At last checking, Asaf’s blood sugar level was 80. I’m thinking that his blood sugar might drop during the night. I’m setting the alarm clock for 1:00 a.m.

With my eyes almost closed, I arrive at Itai’s room. He is on an insulin pump. He seems okay, but something tells me that I must check his blood sugar. The countdown starts. I wait 15 seconds, the result is 432. I’m trying to check the infusion site, but I’m too weak to see. I go downstairs and prepare a shot. I get back in bed. The time is 12:35 a.m.

“Ring, ring!” The alarm goes off at 1:00 a.m. I am dizzy, but still know that I need to check Asaf’s blood sugar level. I’m doing his fingerstick and feeling how hard it must be for my children to deal with this disease. Shots, blood tests, diet, everything by schedule. Even when you do everything by the book, the results might not be the ones that you are expecting.

The countdown starts: 30, 29, 28 – His blood sugar level is 56. I’m going down the stairs again, opening the fridge and getting a juice. I’m calling, “Asaf, Asaf, drink the juice.” He takes the straw between his lips, tries to drink, but falls asleep. After a couple of seconds I have to wake him up again. Finally he finishes his juice. I give him a little bit of water and go back to my room. It’s almost 1:20 a.m. I set the alarm clock to 4:00 a.m.

“Ring, ring!” (4:00 a.m.) I’m so tired, I’m thinking of skipping this blood sugar test, but I know that it is necessary. If the infusion is clogged and needs to be changed, Itai might need another shot.

Half asleep, I open Itai’s glucometer. His sugar is 382. I know that we need to do another shot and change the infusion in the morning. I run downstairs and prepare the shot. I wash my face to make sure that the dosage is right and go on my way upstairs. Itai doesn’t seem to feel that I gave him a shot. That makes me smile. I go back to bed. It is 4:35 a.m.

“Ring, ring,” The alarm went off. Now it is 6:30 a.m. The children have to go to school and I need to go to work. I do Itai’s blood test, 245. Asaf’s sugar is 195. I prepare Asaf’s shot and get the infusion ready. The infusion is ready. Itai is not happy, but he goes to his room and changes it. Asaf gets his shot. I’m measuring breakfast. We are ready to start the day.

When I arrive at work somebody asks me, “How are you?” I say, “Ok, thank you!” I don’t think that I do anything out of the ordinary. I do whatever is necessary for my children to grow healthy. The instant that I brought my babies into the world, I knew that I would move mountains and cross-oceans for them. I work very hard to get closer to the day that my children will go through the day and the night like regular children and that a cure will be found for them and for all the children in the world.

Nurit Gans
Mother of Asaf and Itai